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North
County News 6/16/93
THE
1993 PHILLIES: AS ANIMATED AS THEY COME
Last
weekend the first-place Philadelphia Phillies, the team with the
best record in baseball, invaded Shea Stadium. I'd been hearing
tall tales about this wild bunch; but as often happens in sports,
a team is straddled with an animal image by the media that falls
far short of its bite. It is always incumbent on beat writers
to manipulate that vision of an animated bunch and turn them into
a maniacal clan of loons crashing through the league like a band
of pirates out of control. But although it sells newspapers and
makes for interesting headlines, it is far from anything resembling
the truth. So I decided to stop by the visitor's clubhouse at
Shea Stadium before a game to see for myself.
When
I approached the door of the place I could already hear music
blaring from within. The security guard leaning back on his chair
skipped me as a look as if to say, "Are you sure you want
to go in there?" But I'd heard loud rock music emanating
from a winning clubhouses before, in fact, last year's Braves
locker room could have doubled for the set of Saturday Night
Fever. Never mind the inner sanctum of the 1990 Cincinnati
Reds when the Nasty Boys were romping their way to a title.
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On
cue, Kruk leapt to his feet, grabbed a ball, wound up and
hurled an out-of-control pitch across the crowded clubhouse.
This sent players, reporters and shocked witnesses scurrying
for safety.
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Once
inside I was quickly, if not painfully, able to ascertain that
this was no ordinary sound system; unless, of course, I wandered
on stage at a Mettalica show. But even though the volume was close
to excruciating, I had little trouble picking up the booming voice
of catcher, Darren Daulton with amazing clarity.
"How
many people are coming tonight?" he asked an unsuspecting
clubhouse boy.
"About
fifteen, sixteen thousand; I think," the shaken young man
answered meekly. Daulton then stood on a stool in front of his
messy locker, a hulking man of 6'2 and 220 pounds, and bellowed.
"That's all that's showing to see the battlin' Phils?!"
Suddenly,
a breeze blew by my ear. When I tuned to notice, Mickey Morandini,
the pesky little second baseman sporting the ugliest goat-tee
since Robin Hood, was swinging the biggest bat I'd ever seen just
inches from my head. Above the din I could hear him mumbling,
"Stay down on the ball" over and over with each swing.
Things
were getting dangerous, so I moved to the corner lockers of feisty,
Lenny Dyksra and burly, John Kruk; both in different stages of
undress. The man they call "Nails", back when he was
patrolling centerfield for the New York Mets, was preoccupied
with throwing his clothes in a feverish search for his lucky batting
gloves. Where are my batting gloves?" Dykstra began to scream,
his face getting more red with anger. "Don't tell me I made
this trip without my gloves?!"
Meanwhile,
Kruk was busy entertaining Philly beat writers, who collectively
seemed oblivious to this chaos, and spitting what I believed to
be huge wads of tobacco from his gruff, portly face anywhere he
deemed appropriate. The gregarious first baseman is not your basic
finally tuned major leaguer, but a man born to play the lead role
in a caveman flick. Yet he leads the National League in just about
every offensive category, looking right at home with this biker
gang masquerading as a baseball team.
Just
then, former Phillies shortstop, and present third base coach
Larry Bowa stormed in the scene to address Kruk's pitching prowess.
"Johnny," he cracked. "Show us that backdoor slider."
On cue, Kruk leapt to his feet, grabbed a ball, wound up and hurled
an out-of-control pitch across the crowded clubhouse. This sent
players, reporters and shocked witnesses scurrying for safety.
This
was about all I needed to see, when out of the back room sauntered
Mitch Williams, the man who carries the moniker of "Wild
Thing" like a badge of courage. He is an expert closer and
a big reason this team is where it's at in the standings. He also
looked as though he'd just escaped from a mental institution.
Just like everyone in this room, he has wild flowing hair, a ragged
beard and what looked like a headband right out of Rambo wrapped
around his sweaty forehead.
"Everybody
shut-up!" he shouted. "Let's play this game already,
I'm gonna explode!"
As
I was running out of there I could still hear him scream in that
high-pitched squeal. "Take no prisoners!" And I couldn't
help thinking of three words of advice for the rest of the National
League: Give up now.
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